Spin City: Why Would NBC Spin-Off The Office

So you're NBC. You have this water cooler friendly sit-com, starring a legitimate movie star that both critics and the desirably younger demographics genuinely love. But then in the fourth season, you decide to spread the episodes too thin by making more hour-longs than a normal fan would deem necessary. And between those rough episodes and the WGA Strike things have really hit a dry spell.

So what do you?

Well, of course you order a spin-off series!!!

Oh wait, that's a terrible idea.

Now, you and I know that. But clearly NBC doesn't. Which should come as no surprise, since obviously no one ever accused NBC and Ben Silverman of having a clue. I guess he felt that since Private Practice worked out so well for ABC, that an Office spin-off would work just as well. Never mind that Private Practice sucked big time and, as a result of Shonda Rhimes splitting her duties between it and Grey's, the flagship show suffered immensely too.

Anyway, it's happening. What's worse is that you know we're all going to watch it. At least initially.

Sigh.

Well the big question regarding the show, besides "why is this going to be on the air," is "who's it going to be starring?!" It's one secret that has managed to stay secret.

Here's how I think it all breaks down.

OFF THE BOARD
Michael, Dwight and Jim/Pam

There is no chance that any of these characters get spun-off.

Michael and Dwight *are* The Office. It literally doesn't even exist without them. I won't even dignify the thought of either of them being the focus of the spin-off with another sentence.

Meanwhile, though the last few weeks have painfully teased the removal of both Jim and Pam from the show--Jim could get fired! Pam might move to Philly! Or New York!--how could that ever happen? If Michael and Dwight are The Office's head, Jim and Pam are it's heart (awww, I'm such a corny idiot, aren't I?) And though I'm sure something will happen to keep our two lovebirds from really achieving that "happily ever after" life until the series finale, I doubt it will be splitting them between shows.

SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THERE'S A CHANCE!
Toby, Daryl, Karen, Ryan

A television series about Toby would be terrible. I agree with Michael on this. Toby sucks. He's annoying, his voice is ever-so-whiny and completely grating. If I had to stare at his hang-dog face for 30 minutes every week, well, I just wouldn't even do it. However, everything is set-up for Toby to be the spin-off character--the finale is based on Toby's goodbye party. Still, I think it's too obvious and also too hard of a sell. You aren't going to hitch your spin-off wagon to the guy who's had 50 lines of dialogue in four seasons.

Daryl would be fun. First, who doesn't love Craig Robinson. And (b), having a more blue collar setting would create a whole new dimension of comedy that is barely thought about on The Office. But again, Daryl is almost too fringe of a character. Does anyone really care about him? Plus, if he leaves, we end up missing out on all the amazingly awkward and hilarious interactions he has with Michael.

Personally, I think Karen's branch of Dunder-Mifflin would make for a great show. You'd have a different look with a woman in charge, which would certainly be welcome and less misogynistic. And I think Rashida Jones is an extremely charming actress (and extremely gorgeous), so I'd be down to watch her for 30 minutes every week. As an added bonus, during sweeps, Jim could show up for a meeting and create a whole bunch of awkwardness. Still, Karen might be too "out-of-sight, out-of-mind." And Rashida Jones probably has better things to do.

Here's the pitch: Ryan gets a job way over his head, grows a beard, uses terms like "wunderkind" and gets a recreational drug problem. We can call it the "Ben Silverman Story."

THE DARKHORSE
Kelly

Clearly there is less than a zero percent chance that Kelly Kapoor would get her own show. Mindy Kaling isn't famous. Kelly has had less screen time than Toby. Her character is almost a total non-factor. And yet despite all of that, I would literally watch Kelly/Mindy Kaling sit at her desk, reading e-mails. If there has ever been a better portrayal of a 20-something woman, raised on Sex and the City, US Weekly and The Hills, I have never seen it. You could call it "Kelly Goes to Work" and just follow her around, faux-reality style. It's way too out of the box, and probably a terrible idea, since Kelly could very easily be a dish best served in small portions. But hey, a boy can dream.

THE FAVORITE
Andy

Andy is the obvious and perfect choice for a spin-off. His character is very funny. Ed Helms is a borderline well-known actor. And he's been totally underutilized since joining the show, since he's equal parts Michael and Dwight. On his own, he could be deadly funny. And honestly, an Ed Helms lead show could be like a less successful version of Frasier (and that's not a diss.) It all screams spin-off, one that I could actually see being good. Or at least passable. It's so obvious, that it might as well be the ending of The Village (of course they are in modern times!!!!!!) Come this Fall, we'll all be going home, getting our beer on and getting our Office 2: Electric Boogaloo on. It's a fait accompli.